Learning to love myself

I got my official surgery date today—March 19! It’s really happening. I also start my pre-op class on March 4, and from there, things get real. The next step? A strict 14-day pre-op diet to shrink my liver. That means: Protein shakes twice a day – 28 shakes total, which means I need to stock up on two cases since they only come in packs of 12. One Healthy Choice meal for dinner – paired with ½ cup of vegetables . Three different vitamins for after surgery – a multivitamin, calcium citrate, and B-complex to keep me on track. I keep reminding myself: I’m doing this for my health. The sacrifices, the discipline, the cost—it’ll all be worth it in the end.

   I’ve been talking about my journey—my struggles with weight, grief, and trying to find my way forward. But what I haven’t shared is how I’ve chosen to move forward. I’ve decided to get gastric bypass surgery. It wasn’t an easy decision. In fact, it was one of the hardest choices I’ve ever made. Surgery isn’t a quick fix. It’s expensive, it’s scary, and it forces you to face yourself in ways you never imagined. But after months of trying to push through on my own, I realized that this is the right step for me. I’ve been in this process for six months now, going through all the evaluations, tests, and requirements. Every step has made it more real. And as much as I try to stay strong, I won’t lie— I’m scared. Am I allowed to say that? Because I am. I’m scared of the surgery itself, of how my body will change, and of the unknown that comes after. I have an amazing supporter in my aunt, and I am so grateful for her. But beyond that, I feel like I’m doing this alone. Chen...